today is such a memorable day!!

...bcos today NEVER RAIN!! wahahahaha

soooo happy to see and feel sunshine again! and the temperature is just nice, not too hot not too cold. and no need to walk like skating and can wash clothes liao! hehehe...

so in order to celebrate, i went science canteen to eat lunch. and i lost my transponder on the way =.=
(for those who don't know, transponder is a device used to lock/unlock my room door and the door of the toilet at my level, functions l ike a key) sianz... went back all the way but still couldnt find it. haizhaiz...can only leave my door open... and a new transpoder costs S$42!! haizhaiz...乐极生悲...

i h_a_t_e r_a_i_n_i_n_g d_a_y_z

looks like it has been RAINING for zillion of years...
i really REALLY miss SUNSHINE!!!
cant wash clothes, cant walk properly, plenty of mosquitoes, mould grow on shoes that never dries...
the only nice thing might be yah, it can be nice weather to sleep. but the worst thing is I CANT ENJOY IT!!!

well...i'm soooo fed up with the stupid raining days. which has been lasted for one whole week...or is it more? with break of at most 2 to 3 hours...

+.= +.= +.=

anyway a few nice things happened today.

first, i managed to lower the price of two DJs from UFM1003 by $200 and managed to get some kind of air time for xqrj. yeah =)

second, tickets finally sent to printing!!! after being stucked by all the stupid small probs...finally! the best is i can actually collect it TMR! =D

third, met finalists and briefed them succussfully =.+

fourth, saiho actually sent me a christmas card VIA POST! omg...i really luv it when ppl writes to me...=D =D he used so many stickers and coloured pen and decoration lo... so nice =) actually i shld hv realised he wanted to send me card when he asked my address but i thought he was joking! haha...then i knew its him when i saw the la bi xiao xin sticker on the envelope...he used it last year for the new yr card he gave me also hahaz

fifth, finally managed to meet yang and had a nice dinner time together although the burger was not so nice and toooo big. i like my outfit today and i luv how yang looks in his dark purple shirt, black pants and black leather shoes! =D

=.+ =.+ =.+

well a few bad things also.

i lost another umbrella after i lost mine on christmas eve. arghhh.

yang lent me his umbrella, and i broke it severly when i tried to dry it =,=

wore the SUPER slippery slippers. was like skating all the time. almost fell when jump down from the bus.

suddenly got a lot more things to do on top of my already lot of things. tts why i'm still here now...at this unearthly hour...

like my 1st of the pangkor trip...

like my 1st of my pangkor trip... happy with my courage in going to malaysia alone, touched by xqrj ppl de warm concern, fancinated by the shooting stars in the clear sky at night, entertained a lottt by the banana boat and diving~

yup =====

canvassin

had been canvassin for 4 dayz...
will still be canvassin for the next 2 dayz...
sianz...
tiredz....

not right...

it will not be right if i still run away from updating blog...thou i know this place has limited readers. which is wat i want.

hah

sad about the exam just past. have nv been so no 把握 about exams. started too late, expected too much. was once questioning my own intelligence...well now still questioniong. sometimes really feel 力不从心... can i really do something in physics? God knows...

have studied in all sorts of places. hv studied with all sorts of ppl. hv studies in all sorts of hours. hv studies in all sorts of moods. hv studied with all sorts of weird thinking.

and it ended with such a terrible PC1142 paper. i was like dreaming.

haiz

anwz, love zhihan's smile and joke =)



went check out air tix during CNY. gg back or not? dunno. tix ex plus studies.

XQRJ comm opened. tml going to knock on ppl's doors for selling advertisement. dunno why suddenly feel v listless. dun want to go...

cleaned up my room. mopped floor and re-arranged my desk. now it looks much more clean and tidy and comfortable. mayb this is the only thing that makes me happy in these few days.

numb myself in 叶鹏哥哥's novel and 'gong'. hope they can entertain me...

badminton training starts soon also...and xqrj...my this holiday arh...haihaihaiz

and where are you

supposed to be my busiest time...

supposed to be my busiest time...yet i stil hv 闲情逸致 blog here. not bad not bad.

yang started looking for job and in fact he had found 3 jobs. Nov 7 2006 Tuesday, he officially finished his NS and was back to a civilian (lets juz ignore the reservice part). This is the day i was looking forward all these 2 years, but it happened to be just another day. yang cleared a lot of leave nearer to the end of his NS, so he was already out the week before that tuesday, and on that day what he did was to travel from his home to his camp to collect his IC then back again -.-"

and gosh, i'm damn worried abt the jobs he found. espcially the sales thgy. dar, dun be too money-driven k? muz stay conscious and alert all the time...pls pls...

*cont struggling*

well...

just realised that this gonna be my 100th entry here.

oh well...ever since 2004. around 1 entry per week. haha.

just submitted my ULS2201 final paper in the afternoon. i mean yesterday afternoon. was aiming to finish it last week, then was aiming for day before yesterday 10pm, then for yesterday 3am, then finally i finished it 2pm yesterday afternoon.

super not sure about my this paper. its supposed to be a popular science article, but even myself not sure wat i'm talking about. let alone my readers. oh well. y cant i s/u this module...usp sux.

time flies super fast. nowadays i do one online assessment the whole afternoon plus night gone liao. haiz. isit my problem or my work's problem.

1 and half weeks to go. 1 more paper and revision for 5 modules to go. jiayou jiayou.

before i entre the absolute panic state.

o finally its here

i'm just pissed off. stressed out. going crazy. both physically and mentally.

my eyes are just painful. result of all the stupid pc1142 interference diffraction He-Ne laser experiment. then stare at either laptop or computer in comp lab for at least 10 hrs a day. now i just want to throw my laptop out of my window.

bloody time is running so bloody short and i'm so bloody unprepared.

i get As for my writing, Bs for my bio and Cs for my math and physcis. insteresting trend. as compared to my JC results.

4 months ago i thought 3.5 was peanut. now i see it as mission impossible.

and this bloody SWAMI was the one who inspire me to write this blog. can he become more dis-organised? his question in CA2 was so nicely phrased that almost nobody understand wat he was saying and he still dare to show us the unbelievable that kind of face and say 'i really dun understand why u all cannot do this!' Gosh! sorry sir but i simply dun understand ur indian english at all. and all the bloody mcqs. i tot u all said o we emphasise conceptual understanding? how come u ask me to tell the exact name of the one example molecule which is found in a small line in the totally scattered lecture notes??????

and it was raining. again i nv bring umbrella. again i was wearing the pair of super slippery slippers. i can become weather forecast already. ppl, nxt time u see me nv bring umbrella and wearing this pair of white slippers, u kno its gg to rain.

and y today i chose to wear this t shirt? its so bloody short and irritates me during lectures cos it couldnt cover part of my back!!!

wat a day.

oyah. and i nv finish my lab report in 3 hrs. 3 hrs lehh!! i'm so bloddy loser.

wat a day.

seriously...what am i gonna do in the future...

I used to express my true thoughts in Chinese. Mother tongue. I can express better.
Now I’m trying to write in English. No particular reason. Except that perhaps I subconsciously hope that this is not my true thought.

Was humiliated by my first CA in my university life. Hmm. Never knew that I could do Maths so badly.
Not that I didn’t study. I got. But yah, maybe not enough.
When I was in the MPSH doing the paper, I started panic when I realized that I was not really DOING the questions, but SKIPPING them.
…it was so different from the same tests for the past 3 years, which are the 1 hour papers that I could finish within 40mins. Topics are the same, yes, nothing out of syllabus. But somewhere halfway through the solving process, I was stuck. Panic panic. Couldn’t calm down and think properly, so of course couldn’t figure out the tricky parts. Time ticking ticking…. Sweat. In the end, hmm, I could solve 6 out of the 12 MCQs. High possibility that I got error in that 6 also. So yah, basically, I failed my 1st CA in my uni life.

Honestly it upset me a super lot. I was stoning from MPSH all the way back to KE. Refused to compare answer with other people. Refused to listen to other people talking about the test. Back to room, sat down, started stoning in front of my laptop. Tried to stop myself from stoning, so started surfing net for funny stuff. But obviously my mind was still dunno where, cos when Sharon called me at 930pm I was like ‘oops today got dance?’ didn’t want to go…but I went. It was not bad…at least I could move and dance and talk and laugh loud loud to let out my depress. JUST FORGET ABOUT THE BLOODY PAPER DUE TOMORROW! FORGET EVERYTHING!!!

So after I was back to my room, I started thinking about my USP paper…well…I just finished it 10 minutes ago, and it was all crap. Who cares.

Suddenly not sure where I am. I hate the feeling of being ‘not sure’. This is the cap of my intellectual level. I cant go an higher…or is it a bottleneck? It might be difficult to go through but there’s another big room of improvement ahead waiting for me?
Let’s be optimistic…choose to think in the latter way…

I’m lousy. Cant to arts, cant do science. Writing kills me. Calculus kills me also. Wahaha. Loser 1, loser 2, welcome to the loser land…

start of new life...

已经开始很久了其实……只是假装有点忙，没顾上写>.< 早知道开一个blog就好了……我半个都管不过来……

说到底我还是一个害怕孤独的人。庆幸选择了hall，不然我一定一个人在房间郁郁而终。因为两天hall没有活动我就已经无聊得快疯掉了。

功课忽然增多，倒是没想到这么快就有功课开始累积。主要是因为usp的writing and critical thinking。我又有了当年gp的感觉……
maths和physics竟然会给我前所未有的恐惧。在我对早以忘怀的积分题目瞠目结舌的时候，LT里我周围的人都开始沙沙演算，带着专业无比的表情开始讨论。天。
选择了这条路的我，以后会怎样？

我只能拍拍自己的肩，心平气和的告诉自己，既然选择了，就要昂首挺胸的走下去。

好象上一篇没有贴上来，不知道怎么回事

基本也忘了是在说什么，只记得第一句话是‘实在是消失许久了’。为什么咧？因为在标题和正文第一句打了两遍。

说不记得好象又记得，也就一些关于搬家的牢骚。

太早了，说话也语无伦次。再加上看太多谋杀案，连洗澡都不敢去。其实我有时候还是很胆小滴。

有活动的时候固然锣鼓喧天喧哗连连，但单人房果然孤寂，可怜的电脑一天开十几个小时寥以陪我。

亲情友情爱情三样东西都不好办。
亲情，我们都确定我们是爱父母的，但年龄和经历的差距又让我们无话可说。这还算容易解决。
爱情，属于稀里糊涂的型儿。都不太清楚自己到底想要什么。没情调是呆子，有情调是风流花心。浪漫和现实似乎永远无法共存，再好的孩子成了自己的男女朋友之后都能挑出一大堆缺点来。不过我还是相信真心就好。
友情。不知道……像蛋炒饭？最简单也最困难？哈哈

好象还很清醒。真的要睡觉拉，明天还有mass breakfast...

我们勾勾手，不准不快乐


对了，今天中午第一次吃subway，纪念一下。不对，昨天，昨天。

老天 快一个月没更新了……

老天 快一个月没更新了……

这次搬家倒很快，感觉上就是把东西一摞扛到新地方再逐个放下。也很彻底，真的是全副家当扛上山。也很郁闷。订车车不来，人又感觉烦躁拉着个脸，还好最后还算顺利，不过欠轩哥一个巨大的人情（如果我一个人打死我也搬不成），导致他老人家最后在汗里游泳，连球都没劲打了。

昨天第一天还好，今天就有点感觉寂寞拉

郁闷的搬家……

两年了……

好快…… ('_')

还能想起扬穿着破了两个大洞的灯笼裤单腿跪在地上抬头对着我茫然的说‘我就是队长’的样子。
第一次来宿舍找我的时候热得用右手呼啦呼啦扯校服的样子。
后来我也学会了的抿嘴巴的样子。
打螳螂拳的样子。
funfair上举牌子被我嘲笑的样子。
第一次从背后抱住我的样子。
在沙发上打完瞌睡睁开眼睛看见距离我的脸1cm的大脸的样子。
……

唉，不回忆了，不回忆。

两年后的6月25号我们很巧的没有能见面。
24号我们去吃了东北菜。第一次在正儿八经的餐馆（而不是food court, hawker centre或者是KFC, Mc, Long John）里吃饭。然后毫无目的的逛街，买冰淇淋买糖炒栗子。呵呵……算是两年以来最有感觉的一次逛街么？
26号我们去拍了我们的第一批大头贴。他开始用我送的皮带。
不知道他了解我买皮带时候的曲折么？不管怎么样，他能开始用就让我挺意外挺开心的了。

hey, happy two years' anniversary.

吱~

问羊借来F Math的notes和tutorial，假装自己还在上学。

看来我怀念的方式有点变态=.=

最近眼睛干干的，脑子也一团糨糊

去看了the da vinci code，可能书读得太仔细，个人认为极不过瘾。镜头切换太块。估计编剧把那么长一故事挤进两个半钟头也是不容易的事情。羊却觉得很不错，我在一边琢磨这么快的节奏他一没看过原著的人怎么会知道正在发生啥事。

不说了，不说了

乱写

想起之前在recess的时候钻进com lab在这里匆匆胡诌几句新鲜的牢骚又匆匆赶去上课的情景。

我发誓有一天我一定会重新穿上VJ米白色的校服在VJ的校园里招摇过市……


一天十多个小时盯着电脑的生活确实影响生理和情绪的健康。公司里的闪啊闪的电破脑那是不能不一天看上8小时的。回到家吧除了打开电脑好象其他选择也很有限。老天……谁给我一个tuitotial做啊！！吼！！

希里糊涂就要进大学了，半只脚在社会跟学校边缘荡啊荡的。其实真的是很佩服在公司当了几十年职员一直快快乐乐的人……我绝对无法忍受长期坐在办公桌前一切为了老板。而我又注定不是那种当自己和别人老板的料。得，我还是老老实实当教书匠去吧。

近来有点糊涂，日子就这么流水一样的过。一些事情发生，有些不了了之，有些似乎结束。各种感情纠葛在一起，一下子失望一下子激动，像闭上眼睛安静地坐云霄飞车。大起大落的茫然。

我只想说，我爱你们，我也知道你们爱我。细水常流好么？我们都想珍惜彼此的对么。

我好象想写点什么东西

如题

将心比心和不要以自己的标准来衡量别人，好象是一对自相矛盾滴优点

follow哪一个好呢？抓头皮中…… (",) hehe

alone in the office

besides the boss, who is very fond of working from home, there are altogether _one_ engineer available this morning...
or should i say _half_ an engineer...

manager still not back from cambodia yet. the other more experienced engineer had his grandma passed away so will not be here in the next couple of days. boss, as usual, could be anywhere but the office.

and the whole morning all the calls were from the stupid joyce at the stupid opis.

well, i'm glad that your presence make me look less like a moron.

wondering how this company gonna survive...anw i appreciate i'll be leaving here THOROUGHTLY and COMPLETELY soon.

alone in the office...

besides the boss, who is very fond of working from home, there are altogether _one_ engineer available this morning...
or should i say _half_ an engineer...

manager still not back from cambodia yet. the other more experienced engineer had his grandma passed away so will not be here in the next couple of days. boss, as usual, could be anywhere but the office.

and the whole morning all the calls were from the stupid joyce at the stupid opis.

well, i'm glad that your presence make me look less like a moron.

wondering how this company gonna survive...anw i appreciate i'll be leaving here THOROUGHTLY and COMPLETELY soon.

alone in the office...

besides the boss, who is very fond of working from home, there are altogether _one_ engineer available this morning...
or should i say _half_ an engineer...

manager still not back from cambodia yet. the other more experienced engineer had his grandma passed away so will not be here in the next couple of days. boss, as usual, could be anywhere but the office.

and the whole morning all the calls were from the stupid joyce at the stupid opis.

well, i'm glad that your presence make me look less like a moron.

wondering how this company gonna survive...anw i appreciate i'll be leaving here THOROUGHTLY and COMPLETELY soon.

alone in the office...

besides the boss, who is very fond of working from home, there are altogether _one_ engineer available this morning...
or should i say _half_ an engineer...

manager still not back from cambodia yet. the other more experienced engineer had his grandma passed away so will not be here in the next couple of days. boss, as usual, could be anywhere but the office.

and the whole morning all the calls were from the stupid joyce at the stupid opis.

well, i'm glad that your presence make me look less like a moron.

wondering how this company gonna survive...anw i appreciate i'll be leaving here THOROUGHTLY and COMPLETELY soon.

alone in the office...

besides the boss, who is very fond of working from home, there are altogether _one_ engineer available this morning...
or should i say _half_ an engineer...

manager still not back from cambodia yet. the other more experienced engineer had his grandma passed away so will not be here in the next couple of days. boss, as usual, could be anywhere but the office.

and the whole morning all the calls were from the stupid joyce at the stupid opis.

well, i'm glad that your presence make me look less like a moron.

wondering how this company gonna survive...anw i appreciate i'll be leaving here THOROUGHTLY and COMPLETELY soon.

to end it all

all of a sudden want to end it all.
maybe run to another totally different country. anything left behind can simply sink into the bottom of my mind.
then hah, no need to worry about them any more...

应该继续往前走么？

多走一段，就多一段要不伤心要不快乐的回忆。糟糕的是快乐居多。
于是不停地想回到过去，以至于我开始思考有没有继续走下去给自己徒增烦恼的必要。

或许我应该想想前面还会有开心的事情等着我。但是目前的趋势似乎……就不多说了。前途无亮。
叹一口气继续往前拖步子……
让我们相信生活是美好的。

继续生活在公司……

April也同时离开了，以一种自动消失的方式。她四月三日跟公司请了一个礼拜的假，之后就再也没出现过。
于是我搬到了她的位子上。远离其他人的小隔间。没有刺骨的空调。清爽的电风扇在背后呜呜吹。而且还有地方藏匿我闲暇时偷看一眼的书。
现在我成为唯一一个admin staff，甚至还监管财会和销售。感觉并不如何坏；自己变得重要了没有什么不好。被炒的危险也基本上已被解除（只能说‘基本上’。实在是见识过这里的‘闪电炒人术’=.=）。忙的时候有些stressed up，处处也还是要看人脸色行事。不过已经够好的了。跟好脾气的客户聊天以及跟坏脾气的顾客对骂已经成为我的解压方式~
大家都很有默契地不提wendell的离开。我和两个新工程师之间还偷偷讲起过，经理和老板则是彻底装得跟没事人一样，似乎开掉他早就是顺理成章并且众所周知的事情。我的气愤与不平，很惭愧，在第二天之后似乎都烟消云散。我不得不跟向这个我可能再也见不到的昔日同事承认，没有他的日子并没有想象中的那么难，甚至还更开心一点。大家说笑得多了，老板也频频请吃饭。其实wendell也并不是一个死板板的人，他也会说笑。只是从我的角度看，他一直倾向于相信别人是无可救药的。他对任何人有不满，只会对我说而已，拒绝跟当事人讲，并且毫不掩饰地把我建议他这样做的行为归于天真。加上一点好为人师，加上一点不足够的耐性，办公室的气氛一直就不是那么好。仅此告诫自己，技能学识固然是少不得的。至于与人开心相处的能力，只有更重要而已。

现在的我莫名其妙地成为除经理老板之外呆的时间最久的人。恩……随着我工作量的增加……我是不是应该要求加点$$呢……哈哈哈哈哈哈哈

天上的奶瓶

把箭头换成了奶瓶的形状，无形中好象抒发了我对天真幼稚无知的渴望。似乎这也正是我羡慕阿甘的地方
实在是希望某些残酷的事实和道理对我永远保持费解。我眼巴巴地听着阿甘无辜地说，“for no particular reason… I don’t know why but… people say blah blah blah but I don’t know, I just…”眼馋得仿佛他正嚼着无限量供应的我爱吃但又没钱买的肉干。
对的话往往是无奈的。。。那这些话又有什么屁用？叙述事实而已。比如，选择意味着永远的放弃。多恶心的一句话啊，在我过去的一个月里得到了充分的体现。谁说的这句话？真是找抽。找抽！

讨厌过大的雨

今天真是太爽了……
雨大到打伞跟没打伞一样！已经连成一片所以严格来说不能称为雨点的雨点肆无忌惮地鄙视着如聋子耳朵一般的伞直扑我的全身。从学生家走出没几步，还没到车站，我可怜的两只帆布鞋就已经像两只容器一样盛满了水，走起路来唧唧响=.=……我可怜的牛仔裤已经湿到开始自动往下滴水……
奶奶的……我就这么狼狈地往教育部赶去……
Teaching award的考试在我们这帮人常去的auditorium里进行……众所周知的冷。我累赘的贴身的湿透的牛仔裤和鞋子开始迫害我的下肢。我的两条腿委屈地蜷在狭小的座位间，湿气意气风发地带走我的latent heat，尤其是膝盖的部位，裤子被顶得紧紧贴在上面，冷飕飕得让我觉得关节炎要来了……
而这个天杀的考试居然用了4个钟头……

中间休息的时候赶紧冲向比较温暖的厕所。脱下鞋子发现掉色的劣质染料已经把我的袜子染得通红~~幸好这个染料持续劣质，所以袜子上的红也是洗洗就掉了。

好象但凡有scholarship的考试或是面试，都会在我毫无准备的情况下下大雨，暴雨，把我搞得十分狼狈，然后成功让我fail或potentially fail这些考试面试（其实也就两个而已，呵呵）=.=…不知道下个礼拜二的又一个面试会不会延续这个光荣传统……

生活在公司

昨天老板开掉了wendell, 公司唯一的一个工程师。
开掉了工程师的老板好象很高兴。今天中午拉整班人出去吃饭。味千拉面里五个人捧着四碗拉面吃得酣畅淋漓。老板笑话不断，神采奕奕，甚至主动提出跟我分享冰淇淋。我内心有愧地跟他们胡说八扯，终于忍心在老板递给我那个冰淇淋的时候说了些小讥讽的话。不过看得出来这也没带给他什么心理上的刺激。我沮丧地想这个人就这样走了。在我们的庆祝声中。
我看可能没人会想到昨晚wendell发简讯告诉我这个消息的时候我激动得大骂老板，发誓要向老板问个明白。荒谬之举！把最有经验的工程师开掉招进来两个什么都不知道的愣头青有个屁用！我热血沸腾地举起手机，然后一分钟之后闷不吭声地把它放下。
生活……好象就是这样。

...

扬，
刚刚跟妈妈在msn打电话，又讲起你。这次我是真的生气了。在我妈说出“低俗，恶心”之后，我身手敏捷地一把摘下耳麦扔了出去。
我是在生谁的气呢？让我好好想想。
我气妈妈的偏见。也气你的不争气。
你会委屈和生气的说我什么也没做啊？
我也有错吧。过分强调绝对的平等，忘了男生毕竟是男生，女生毕竟是女生。
坦白点吧。我在意你整天整天的没有消息。我在意一整个月不能见面，即使你已经回到新加坡。我在意你越来越简短，内容越来越一致的简讯。我在意我们在街上面面相觑不知道要去哪里。我在意一个月之后第一次见面你跟我说的第一句话是“你等我一下我去厕所”。我在意你有空我们却不能见面。我在意我见不得人的隐形身份。
我知道你病了，很累，很忙，你的家庭不方便。我都知道。
妈妈说你其实并不怎么在乎我。我差点也这么想了。在你10个小时没有联系我的时候。但我更愿意告诉自己你其实是在乎我的，只是你的表达方式不同。你不会去做什么，你就是傻傻的喜欢我。我不能要求你爱我的方式跟我爱你一样，对么？
尽管我是那么希望你可以像我一样时时都想着联系对方，义无返顾地向父母坦白我们之间的事并努力博取他们的赞同，利用几乎所有可能的机会见面，不管我有多累，或者病得多辛苦。
幻想我们能一起分享各自喜爱的经典电影，音乐，书籍，对世界上发生的事情发表成熟睿智的想法。拉着我的手，带着我去欣赏你喜爱的世界的大街小巷。讨论人生和心理，认真地细细地看我的文字。
然后我悲哀地发现这已经不是你了。
好吧，不要求这么多。即使你对我像我们刚开始和还没开始的时候一样也好啊。翻看那个时候的短信，起码我们还会真正地谈谈心，起码你还会主动写华文的短信给我。
你尽可以把我的这封信总结为陈芝麻烂谷子的抱怨，贪得无厌的索取。我只想告诉你，我爱你爱得好辛苦，我快支持不住了。我知道你可能要到猴年马月才会想起check一下email，然后看到这封信。不要告诉我你看了，心里明白就好。
有一件事是非常明白的。我们最终会分开。我们不会永远在一起。尽管我想象不出我们会怎么分手。所以请不要再说我嫁给你以后我们就可以每时每刻在一起。我知道这是多么的不可能。
我想，现在我应该，还爱你吧。应该是吧。
蛋

choice

我现在要开始选择写怎样的日记。
流水帐型的？搞笑型的？哲思型的？
好象每一个都有它存在的理由。
不能让我跟着感觉走。会让我的天下大乱>.<

等下还要选择几点睡觉。几点起床。早餐几片面包。牛奶倒多少。午餐肉切多厚。……。……。

我看我是有点不太正常拉
睡吧睡吧

不写可以么

有且仅有一个人说过我的眼神很忧郁。
听起来不错，因为好象很有气质的感觉，像高质量的爱情故事里的女子。
听起来好象又很错，因为我不想不快乐。

我打理了一下自己的眼神，让它散乱没有目的的撒在前面，再稍稍垂下一点眼皮。我忧郁了。
想想同样的眼神，哦只不过眼皮收紧了一点，曾经让军训的教官说有杀气，我真是一个有天分的演员。

hi i back again...

yah i'm back...
again...to s'pore
tired now...

its a entirely diff life